Black Eyes

"I'm looking to the sky to save me
looking for a sign of life
looking for something
to help me burn out bright

and I'm looking for a complication
looking cause I'm tired of trying
make my way back home
when I learn to fly"*

phantom Blood

I look up from the floor my Queen O my Queen my mind reels for a moment

You are on Your throne

Your image Your glorious image Your avatar in 3D above me You sit perfectly straight Your white face and black eyes

You sit as motionless as marble Your eyes staring straight ahead like the smoothest stone Your skin pale Your lips red Your motionlessness astounds me

I look into Your black polished eyes I see these total depths the abyss and the Blackhole disease Your darkness is the knowing in all my cosmos

Your right hand with blood nails holding a thin black scepter it reaches to the floor a black onyx stone perched at the top

You are bathed in Blood red light it emanates from within You

as incense makes smoke around You it is the only thing that moves it rises from the base of Your throne slowly emerging to wrap around You to court You from Your feet to Your crown

Nag champa I recognize it it is my favorite scent besides Your scent You smell like copper

I am entranced at Your feet watching You in Your Majesty moonflowers and gardenias in bloom around Your throne

it is tall in the shadows red and black lined and adorned with rubies moonstone and black onyx emblazoned

incomprehensible symbols flash before my eyes in the Blood red dark

and then I see Your magnificent crown splendid and sublime in the dark

moonstone and black onyx ruby encrusted multifaceted filigreed with beads and shing stones and intricate metalwork it is regal powerful feminine

a black bridal veil sits beneath it open and framing your face

pitch black hair flowing below red highlighted thickly out from underneath like Blood flowing freely

Your head does not turn You do not look down Your Black Eyes do not move but You know I am here

everything about You is red and black Your gown your crown Your adornments Your throne I breathe You all in I am intoxicated

the deepest reds I have ever experienced crimson and maroon swirling echoing yet forever distinct

the consummate shadows here as beautiful ornament to Your image in a thousand folds crevasses and fissures intricate patterns hypnotizing

I get a little dizzy I feel Your powerful sustaining hand on my shoulder even though You do not move from Your perfect Crimson/Maroon Throne‑Presence

I would shield my eyes completely but You have decreed in your powerful gentle way that I look

Your skin stark white in the red light pale and regal

Your Black Eyes looking past me but on me all about me looking through me right through me O Queen Your eyes again I am drawn into Your Black Depths

if You were human You might even be considered stoic but You are nothing like us

becoming overwhelmed I look down to Your feet noble and white Your nails are red black cords about Your ankle red and black rings adorn Your toes

my fingers hover shakily above the bridge of Your foot wanting to touch it wanting needing to

"I don’t propose… O Goddess… I do not presume…" I'm transfixed I'm trembling like a child "You are too powerful to look upon my Queen"

the vision ended in darkness at the foot of Her avatar

lux lucis
Solitary of the Elixir
2026

*from Learn To Fly by Foo fighters

©John Edward Smith Jr.